Have you ever been envious of someone else’s life – or – just wished your life’s story was being written differently?
Yea…me either…but I have friends who do….
Ok…just playin’….real talk.
I’m envious of other people’s lives more often than I would like to publicly admit and there are many moments, in the quietness of my heart, that I’m confounded by how my life has played itself out.
I wouldn’t have chosen the way my life – my story – is being written.
I wish we hadn’t lost Chels’ dad to pancreatic cancer our first year of marriage.I wish there wasn’t a season of intense familial discord. I wish my mom wasn’t in the fight of her life against pancreatic cancer. I wish my little girl was getting to experience a normal infancy and not confined to a bed in the NICU. I wish certain sins in my life would stop lingering around and be put to death. I wish I was a man of more godly character. I wish many, many, many things were different…
Having said that, in reflection, all of those things that I wouldn’t have chosen have made me the man that I am today. Those stories, those mini-narratives in the story arc of my life, have strengthened my resolve, grounded my faith in Jesus, and turned my eyes to the hills (Psalm 121).
Losing Chels’ dad taught us how to cherish life and realize that it was truly a vapor.
Sifting through familial discord educated me about the power and need for forgiveness.
Walking alongside of my mom has given me perspective on the omnipotence of our Heavenly Father.
Our experience in the NICU with our Davy girl has made me more desperate for God.
My sins have made me cry out “who will save me from this body of death” and long for heaven.
Desiring greater godliness has given be a deeper motivation to fight sin.
All of the things I wouldn’t have chosen are the very things, the very stories that have shaped and are shaping me.
So I’m done.
I’m done comparing my life to someone else’s Instagram filtered one. My life is short, a vapor, a mist that is here today and gone tomorrow. In this life, I have a choice what I’m going to do with it and I’m assuredly not going to spend it living vicariously through people’s social media feeds and envying their lives.
I’m also done wishing my story was different. I want to LIVE and embrace MY story – all of it. All the trials, prosperity, sadness, joy, failure, victories, ugliness, beauty and all the glorious grey in between
Those that know me, know that I love quotes. It’s a little obsessive and strange (we all have our quirks right?!?), but two have settled into my bones during this season.
A smooth sea never made a skillful sailor. – English Proverb
Prosperity is a great teacher; adversity a greater. – William Hazlitt
For the rest of my days I will endeavor to be a “skillful sailor” braving the tumultuous, temporal sea of my earthly existence and to always take the greater teachers that life has to offer so that I can say like Paul did at the end of his life, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” (2 Timothy 4:7).
So let’s be done with comparing, envying and longing for a different story.
Live YOUR story.
Davy Update & Prayer Requests
(Davy looking ridiculously cute thanks to her primary night nurse Amanda! Amanda and Davy both share “diva” status 🙂
Davy continues to astonish and baffle everyone. She has responded so well to her surgery. They prepared us that she could get extremely sick following the procedure, but it never happened. Day by day she gets progressively better. We still have a long road ahead of us (~2 months +), but we’re grateful that God has been abundantly gracious to our family during this time.
- Davy’s Recovery – As I stated above, we still have a long road ahead of us in regards to recovery for our little girl. Pray that her lungs would continue to get stronger, that her intestines would work properly and that she would recover speedily.
- Elizabeth & Jacob – Continue to pray for our friend Elizabeth and her little boy Jacob. They have been in the NICU for a long time and little Jacob continues to have complications. Pray for healing over Jacob and that Elizabeth would feel the comforting hand of God.
- Rick – One of our night nurses brother-in-law (Rick) was diagnosed with stage IV cancer. Be praying for his healing and comfort for his family.
Thank all of you for continuing to weather this tumultuous sea alongside of us. We’re beginning to see glimpses of the shore, but it’s still a long way off. Grateful to have community that continues to remind us that as we pass through the waters God is still with us (Isa. 43:2).